Stress can be an ugly five letter word and everyone has it. Stress is not always a bad thing but it is a rarity that it is good. Stress is a part of life. It comes to us in a variety of forms but is most often recognized when it begins to affect a person’s life negatively. This is even truer when it begins to affect a person’s sexual health.

There are so many things in our lives that cause stress. Lack of money, increase in bills, and traffic are all causes of bad stress. Holidays and birthdays cause good and bad stress. Most people love a good holiday gathering but hate having to plan and get ready for it. Birthdays are a lot of fun when you are young but as you get older you begin to stress over the fact that you are indeed getting older. Stress is everywhere and despite your best efforts you will not and cannot escape it. Your only choice is to deal with it before it deals with you.

Effects of Stress on the Body

The effects of stress can be disheartening. Our bodies are made to handle a lot of trials throughout our time on Earth. However, like any other machine, stress can make parts wear out. Our hearts, lungs, and other vital organs all feel the damage caused by extreme amounts of stress. Ulcers of the stomach and heart attacks are just a few of the severe, life-threatening affects of stress that people risk suffering from. Less life-threatening, but just as depressing, is the affect stress can have on a person’s sexual health.

When a person is in good sexual health they are able to enjoy themselves thoroughly while participating in sexual activities. They have no trouble with reaching climax or becoming aroused. For men, impotence is only a word and not an experience. For women, the desire to have sexual intercourse is strong and healthy.

As a person becomes overwhelmed with stress their ability to lead a happy and healthy sexual life diminishes. The thought of even having sex is repugnant. They are either too tired or too sick from the affects of stress on their bodies to even imagine having the strength to embrace another person intimately. This is the first red flag that stress has taken over a person’s sexual health.

Some people may find the drive to have sex but not be able to come to a finish worthy of applause. They discover that coming to an orgasm is too hard and frustrating. This is usually because the person is so preoccupied subconsciously with all of his or her problems that are causing them stress that they are unable to fully give themselves over to the building climax. Not only is this frustrating for the person experiencing the problem, it is embarrassing.

The Symptoms

There are various symptoms experienced by women and men whose sexual health is being affected negatively by sex.

Symptoms often experienced by men are:

• Lack of or decrease in desire to have sexual intercourse
• Inability to achieve or maintain an erection
• Premature ejaculation
• Lack of ejaculation
• Decreased amount of ejaculatory fluids, also known as a dry orgasm
• Inability to orgasm

Symptoms often experienced by women are:

• Loss of or decrease in desire to have sexual intercourse
• Vaginal dryness despite arousal
• Inability to orgasm
• Loss of or decrease in sensitivity to clitoris and vaginal area

As embarrassing as the symptoms are, they should not be overlooked or tossed aside to be dealt with later. In fact, the more a person ignores their sexual health the harder it will be to correct the problems and improve their sexual health later. Too often people suffer in silence afraid to ask for help from their physician. In reality they should be running to the doctor for help.

When stress affects a person’s sexual health it is almost always after it has begun to affect another part of a person’s body. This is why seeing your doctor when you notice symptoms of a weakened sexual appetite that last longer than a week is so important. The affects of stress on a person’s circulatory system can play a huge role in the ability to maintain or even achieve an erection. A hormonal imbalance caused by stress can mean the difference between being interested in sex and never wanting it again. Sounds scary, but its true!

How Counseling Helps

There are treatments for stress that can help a person become sexually healthy again. Counseling is a treatment that many doctors will suggest and it never hurts. Exercise is another treatment. You may be saying “wait, I’m too tired and stressed to exercise.” This is when you have to get tough on yourself and make yourself exercise. Exercising releases endorphins which are “feel good” chemicals that are produced in our brains. The more “feel good” chemicals released in your brain, the better you will begin to feel. Many people have even found the urge to have sex after working out is increased.

You don’t have to let stress chase away sex from your life. You can take control of your stress and show it who is boss. Start looking for ways to manage your stressors and even try to eliminate those stressors which are unnecessary. Plan a romantic evening and tell yourself that you won’t allow stress to play a part in it. Take back control of your sexual health.

How many times have you said to yourself “How will I ever get through this day?” Likely, you don’t want to answer that question because you know the number is quite high. The good thing about this question, as well as the answer which pertains to it, is that you are not alone. Everyone gets stressed – everyone feels the negative effects of stress on their life. There’s no way to avoid it; it is, in the end, a fundamental trait of the human condition. The fact of the matter is that we live a task based existence. In other words, we live a life that is full of mundane tasks which are oriented around things which we don’t enjoy. Hence, we are tested and stretched beyond our limits constantly.

What is Stress?

Just hearing or reading the word stress makes people stressful. It’s an ironic cycle that perpetually gets worse and worse. We fear stress, so we become more stressful, which causes us to loath stress even more, and so on and so forth. Sometimes, it is difficult to break the cycle if it becomes too large. One of the biggest aspects of stress, and what everyone should understand, is that stress is not a thing. It’s a reaction to things. Of course, stress isn’t all bad. There is such thing as good stress and bad stress. Stress can promote wellness as well. The problem people have is finding the fine line, the balancing point, between the offset of good stress and bad stress.

Who Needs Stress Management?

The simple answer to this question is that everyone needs some kind of stress management. Imagine a situation where you go to a dinner party. Generally, what is discussed at these kind of events? Usually people talk about the problems in their lives. They talk about bad health, wayward teens, problems at work, money troubles, difficult bosses and so on and so forth. Due to the consequence of living in the society we live in, everyone needs stress management. If you don’t, well, then you’re not living a normal life.

The ‘Rubber Band Theory’ of Stress:

Many experts have dubbed stress as the ‘Rubber Band Theory’. In essence, this is akin to stretching an elastic band almost to its limits, then letting it relax into its original shape. In this form, you can reuse the rubber band as many times as you’d like. However, if you stretch the band too far, it will break. Now metaphorically transform this to the context of your own life. Everything has a breaking point – even you. If too much stress builds up in your life you will suffer dire consequences.

5 Ways to Reduce Stress in Your Life:

• Exercise: Without a doubt, one of the best ways to reduce stress in your life is through a regular routine of exercise. Studies have shown that physical activity has numerous physiologic effects, such as the positive effects on the cardiovascular and musculoskeletal systems. Exercise is vital to the well-being of our minds, bodies and spirits. The biggest benefit of physical activity is not the direct effects, but the enhancement of psychological well-being. Generally, a good physical fitness program to reduce stress will include aerobic exercises, strength training, and stretching.

• Yoga: Experts have been continually finding that yoga is one of the best practices for the body and mind; in other words, it is one of the best ways to reduce stress. Physically, yoga will invigorate and heal the body. Muscles become toned and tightened and the spine is guided into proper alignment. Moreover, the mental aspects of yoga have perhaps the best correlation with stress reduction. Yoga increases body awareness and relieves chronic stress patterns. Yoga will help you counter stressful situations in everyday life as well.

• Sleep: One of the biggest causes of stress is lack of sleep. Simple put, you cannot function at your best if you are tired. Over forty million Americans suffer from chronic sleep disorder. This is a large number of the population. The cycle is vicious – no sleep, less resilience, more stress, less sleep. Here, it is important to know how much sleep your body needs on a nightly basis. The average person needs 7 to 8 hours of sleep every night. However, this can change depending on both your lifestyle and physical makeup. Also, stress may also be reduced from the occasional power nap. Power naps can last up to twenty minutes and are great way to gain an additional boost of energy, as well as alleviate built up stress. It should be noted that too long of a nap can result in a person feeling groggy – and even more stressful.

• Dreaming: Everyone dreams – this is a fact of life. However, not everyone remember their dreams in waking life. Dreams are an important tool in deducing how we sub-consciously feel about our life. This may include how we feel about our relationships, how we feel about our abilities, our family, and even our jobs. They make us ponder spiritual questions and have profound healing power. Therefore, dreams can be used to help people make informed, stress reducing, decisions in their life.

• Meditation: We are more than the sum of our parts. We know that the deliberate departure for the workday world is vital to our ongoing well-being. One of the best ways to do this is through various meditation techniques. This could include meditated breathing, all the way to muscle relaxation.

When you are in your 50’s your life changes for good. Your priorities, the way you look at things around you, your relationships and most important of all, your body – all of them change. Though we are in an era where age does not define everything, and you do not have to be bound by stereotypes of the past generations (those who believed that sex and a fun filled life is only for young people) there are certain realities of aging that you still have to deal with. If you do not deal with these realities in time it could end up affecting your sexual health.

Tackle the dryness:

Vaginal dryness is a problem that some women start experiencing when they are in their 50’s due to the decrease in the amount of estrogen in their system. This in turn affects the vaginal lubrication and causes dryness. Reduced or lack of adequate lubrication could make sex a painful experience for you and it also increases your risk of contracting vaginal or urinary infections. Reduced lubrication also means less sensation and women often have a tough time reaching orgasm. Even when they do, it is not as intense as it was in when they were younger. If you are facing this issue, it is advisable that you consult your physician and opt for a vaginal lubricant. These products will help you overcome the vaginal dryness issue and  enable you to enjoy sex better with your partner.

Pay attention to stress:

As a woman, you can easily get stressed as you might often find yourself in situations where you have too many things on your plate. There are umpteen things that could stress a woman. It could be something as simple as purchasing a new pair of jeans to something as important as worrying about your finances. Apart from this the fast paced routines, the crazy diets as well as unhealthy lifestyles that you subject yourself to do not help. When you are stressed it affects your libido. So pay attention to stress and find ways to relax. This could mean having some “me” time doing something that you love or it could be a relaxing massage or just talking a walk in the park or on the beach.

Pay attention to your changing body:

As you enter your 50’s it is very important that you pay attention to your changing body. Bear in mind that your metabolism would not be at its peak thus it is advisable that you concentrate on your diet. Include plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables so that your diet contains antioxidants. These nutrients help lower your cholesterol and support healthy digestion. Along with a healthy diet do not forget to exercise regularly. Exercising regularly and maintaining an active lifestyle keeps you healthy and builds your strength and stamina. It also helps reduce stress and keeps your heart strong. Pilates or yoga classes are also recommended as they help with flexibility, keep your joints lubricated and your mind calm.

Apart from exercises it is also important that you stimulate your brain which in turn keeps you lively. Some of the activities that you could pursue are meditation, learning a new language, engaging in a debate and picking up a new hobby. Many people in their 50′s enjoy gardening, sailing or taking an RV across the country. Setting goals also helps as this activates the area of your brain which is linked to action and positive thinking.  All in all these healthy habits benefit your health and sex life too.

When you pay attention to these details you will realize that you are no longer limited by the changes that take place in your body. You  will have the confidence to concentrate on your relationship and bring back the excitement to your life.

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